January 11 2019

Posted on January 11, 2019

January 11 2019

Today is Friday. The start of the weekend. Do you long to feel calm and relaxed about the weekend? Do you wish that you could not feel compelled to be finding a relationship or working hard to set up a date or work one of the dating apps?

That is what many of my clients wish as well. Too many people think the answer to their lonely or a less than satisfying life, is a relationship. However, this would be a mistake. Depending on a person, who has their own needs and agenda, to make your life better, is doomed to blow up. Instead we want to build a life we have control over.

While the world has its challenges, it also has many wonderful things. It does take effort and courage to build a new life and relationship with yourself. We are going to focus on getting you out into the world and creating things you love. Singapore has many things to offer, even if you have to get a bit creative.

This blog, “Being alone without being lonely” is taking you on a year long journey as we explore life on your own. Together I’ll help you learn to love your own time and activities. As you head into the weekend, I want you to start thinking about how you want to feel about how you use your time.

January, is typically a month focused on goals. For you, I want you to plan out your weekend. See my early blog when I wrote about planning your day to avoid that lonely feeling. Make this a loving and thoughtful ritual. Afterall, this is about you. Get home, get all comfy. Maybe get a special meal and put on your favorite music and most comfortable cloths. Light a scented candle. What the heck. Really go full out.

Things to think about for your weekend:

-How do you want to feel each morning when you wake up? Do you want to feel good about the choices you made the previous night? What would make you feel good in the morning? Do you want to loose a whole morning sleeping or what would you love to do instead? Get up and feel good to go to a special yoga or F45 class? What about cycling?

How about planning to get up Saturday morning and get an amazing coffee and read the newspaper. How you start the day makes a huge difference. What you do the previous night affects your morning. So plan carefully.

If you are affected by huge feelings of loneliness, limit the alcohol consumptions. It may make you feel good in the short term, but worse the next few days.

Keeping a regular sleep schedule and going to bed early is the best way to make up sleep. Not going to bed late and sleeping in. I know its tempting, but it’ll mess up your body rhythms.

Other things to plan for Saturday and your Sunday are researching things you’d like to do in the coming months. Plan some time to research activities or classes you’d like to take. Singapore has some great theatre shows coming, there are wonderful comedy events and concerts. Plan out what is coming. Its great to have things to look forward to.

Have you put off reading the paper or a book. Schedule 30-45 minutes on both days. Do you say you’d like cook? Well, why not plan on Friday what you might cook on Saturday or Sunday. Remember you’ll need to go shopping and that can be fun. Why not get up early and check out a wet market for an adventure.

Use your Friday evening to think about how you want this weekend to go. Run this weekend as an experiment. See what you can learn about yourself and what you like.

Then make sure to plan Sunday. I find those late afternoon hours are challenging for my clients. Make sure to have exercise every day to set your mood. Morning is the best. It sets your mood for the day and you get done and you’ll feel great.

Give it a go