Well almost your first week of the new year down and how are you doing? How do you feel? Do you want to feel better? Probably if you are reading this blog. Thank you very much for reading this, I appreciate it.
I am going to just get you to start thinking about how you want to structure your life for 2019 and your goals. I have so many people focusing on goals that have nothing to do with who they are or how they want to feel. Instead, they’ll often say, I should be healthy so my goal is to eat better! Or I want to get in shape and I should be more fit so I SHOULD go to the gym. I want to develop myself and I should read the newspaper. I want to write a book! I’ll write a book as a goal.
These are their goals. Do you notice anything? I can tell they’ll won’t be able to push them through. Do you know why?
Well first of all, to have successful in goals, you need to think about why you are doing something and how do you want to feel. I’ll cover this in another blog. Another, fail factor with goals like this is that they are about what someone believes they SHOULD do versus what they want to do. I’ll also cover this more specifically. Another reason is that there is a clear objective of how the person wants to feel as result of this doing. I’ll also cover this in another.
Finally, what I want to cover here, is the lack of specificity and precision. Most people write goals like this, very vague and broad. It makes it to hard to follow through and usually they don’t.
So if you want to do go to the gym and work or get fit, you need to ask yourself. Do I like the gym? Why haven’t I gone before? What has led me to fail. If you don’t know how to use the equipment or lack a gym membership or are body conscious….how will you push that through.
To be successful with your goals you need to really break them down and be specific.
Concern or failure point: I don’t know how to use the gym.
Solutions: Get a consultation with with a fitness expert at my gym. Make appointment by January 10th, 2019
Get a membership by January 9, 2019
That mean I need to research and tour gym, wait, I can’t do that by January 9, 2019, change Gym membership to January 22, 2019.
Goal: Set 3 appointments with Gyms for tours by January 10, 2019
Decide by January 20, 2019
Sign contract by January 22, 2019
Set an appt with physical expert by January 29, 2019
Start Gym by Feb 5 on my own.
Wait! Do I have clothes? Yes/no…I’ll wait to see what people wear.
This is an example how to be specific and really think about the steps you need to accomplish to actually start to the get gym. You need to think about what is stopping you now. You need to think about timeline, probably just as you do for your work. Then you need to set timelines. This way you can keep yourself honest.
Being very specific is important.
Another example is people wanting to write a book. They are not specific. You need to break it down.
I will write 500 or 1000 words on Wednesday, Saturday and Sunday every week starting January 10, 2019. Notice I didn’t say complete a book. Write words. Too many people make their goals so big that they become overwhelmed by them. They fail to start because it is so big. You want to make it specific and small. Here, the goal is just to write. It may form a book or not. But if you don’t start the habit of regular writing, no book, nothing will happen.
So if you have a big goal of GET FIT in 2019. You need to break that down. What exactly does that mean? How will you measure it. Does that mean you will fit into your skinny jeans? Does that mean you want to loose a specific amount of weight? How much and by when and is that realistic? Does that mean you want to eat better? What does eating better mean, do you have accurate knowledge.
This types of questions and being specific are very important. Why, because you matter. You would never be so vague at work so why are you vague with yourself. This is what it takes to define and set and meet goals. It is funny how people will do this at work, but are fatigued and can’t be bothered to do it for themselves. Unfortunately, there is no short cuts.
One last note on limiting the use of internet. I often have clients saying they’ll get fit or want to eat better. I ask them, how will they acquire their knowledge? They’ll often say, Oh, I’ll google it.
No to google unless its to find an expert!
There is so much garbage on the internet. If you want quality, you need to pay for it. Get a paid subscription to a newspaper. Pay for a consultation with a financial expert. Pay to see a nutrionist sports expert or fashion person or some expert with what you want to accomplish.
People will, oh I can’t afford it. I’ll say really? You can’t afford. Does it mean you will have to give up the $200, 500, $1000 you spend on clubbing and drinking that weekend? Yes. Does it mean maybe you can’t eat out for lunch or dinner as much a month or two. Yes. Does it mean maybe, you have to take one less vacation a year…yes!
Then people say, both those things make me feel better they are fun. Then I usually say with a lot of therapy, you are not serious about your goals. You need those things because your life isn’t the way you want it. It’s a vicious loop. If you want change, it takes effort and may have to give up pleasure in the short and invest in yourself to get the long term benefits.
You also need to think of those payments as an investment in yourself, not a tax.
So if you don’t want to spend on yourself to get expert knowledge, you may have to re-evaluate your goals and how serious you are. Real change around fitness, healthy, financial well being takes a lot of effort and change. It isn’t easy, but if you do it right and break it down it is something you can achieve.
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