May 28th 2019

Posted on May 27, 2019

May 28th 2019

May is going so fast! We have been busy at work exploring another aspect of dealing with and eliminating the feeling of loneliness. Learning to be alone without feeling lonely is a challenge for some people. We want to learn how to like ourselves, our time and develop interests that we can do on our own. This is so important because this feeds into how we develop and set healthy boundaries so that when we go out into the world, we can interact in safe and fun ways with people.

If you are dealing with loneliness, often one or several aspects may be impairing your ability to make meaningful connections. What have you been noticing as you go through this blog and do the exercises? The prior blog was on examining your roots of self-esteem and how much you like yourself.

I want to explore this more in this blog. In past blogs I was talking about developing your pillars of your life that will help shape who you are and form your identity. Today, I want you to reflect on what is it you like about yourself and what do you value. This is so import because you need to think about these aspects when forming boundaries.

We can look at yourself in different areas of your life. Let’s examine your work life. Do you feel that you are a good employee? Are you creative at work? Do you do well at being reliable and competent. What does your work mean to you? Examine your work and what role does it play in shaping your identity of yourself. Does work make you feel good about yourself? Write those positive attributes down.

What about generative issues? Generative issues are issues in which we start to be concerned about the world at large and things outside of ourselves. Are you concerned about politics? Do you stay up to date on what is going on your own country? Do you vote? What kind of citizen are you? Do you volunteer? What motivates you to do this and what does volunteering give you? Are you active in environmental issues? Do you act locally by trying to reduce your carbon footprint? All these aspects are so important and shouldn’t be minimized. These are choices and values that make you who you are.

What kind of friend are you? What do you offer someone for friendship? Are you a good companion?

What about in terms of your spiritual life? This does not mean you have to belong to an organized religion, but rather do you nurture your spiritual life. Do you have a sense of a higher power? Some people have a god, other people look to nature or a concept of a higher power. Connection to something larger than one’s self is very important. Think about how this defines you. If you do not have this, this can be an area to explore.

Think about all the aspects of yourself and what is the value you bring to those who meet you. Do you acknowledge and celebrate how special you are? These are so important to do so that you can see you are someone worth protect through boundaries. A relationship with you is important and special. So, you’ll want to know what that is. Get going on yourself exploration.

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